The mask of light

Nothing is certain, not anymore.
Time seems endless and yet rapid.
It is the uncertainty that drives the best of us.
The drama and fear keeps the race going.
For fear will force its way into a fragile mind.
It will confound and crack it.
The uncertainty will eventually overrun.
Nothing is clear, not ever.
Stains in glass cloud what's behind the surface.
The shining light does nothing to unveil the hidden.
Shadows and doubt are all that are truly visible.
The light just covers up the truth.
For if there was never any light.
All would be certain.

Waiting

The minutes on the digital clock in front of me seem to rarely change.
My shift ends soon, but does it really?
The minutes seem like years.
There's been so much chaos and uncertainty lately.
Nothing Makes Sense.
Maelstrom. Confusion. Frustration.
It's all too much.
But not really.
The turbulence is what really keeps me going.
But when will the chaos end?
When will the chaos consume me?
Will it consume me or will I be the one who consumes it?
"F" this maelstrom.
There hasn't been a solid rock in years.
When will my shift be over?

Was it a mistake?

I just can’t believe This.
I can’t even remember anymore, the way it was.
It’s just so strange. Never
did I imagine it would happen the way
it went last night. I
would like to imagine it was planned.
Maybe it’s better to let it be sporadic and Not
let it spin out of control. This is my
love after all. I just hope she knows my intention
was so dear. I
don’t mean to hurt, so I’ve got
to make things right. So
this is where I need to be brave.
We thought to much to drink
was just an expression. So with beer in hand
we lost
our simple friendship. It was probably my
doing. We had both lacked discretion
either way. It's
just not
that simple. What
if last night didn’t turn out like it did? I'm
so used to
us just being friends, but is it just?
To just wanna
have her like I did, on top of the friendship? I try
to hide my feelings but now that seems wasted. You
silly boy, what were you thinking? You need to be on
the next train out of this room. I'm
stuck here though. Something holds me here. Maybe I’m curious
about what she thinks. I hope she’s not thinking I used her. She’s waking. “For
I am no False Dimitri. I will forever be true to you.”
But I should leave before I get caught.
Go ahead girl, you have my attention.